What Impact Will Moderate or Severe TBI Have on a Person's Life?

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Please remember, we are not able to give medical or legal advice. If you have medical concerns, please consult your doctor. All posted comments are the views and opinions of the poster only.

I had a server tbi and it is tuff to live most the time !!

last year people attack on me and try to kill me .i have serious brain injury and stay comma in 3 weeks loose my memory as well.i know that attackers but bcz i am illegal in this country police don't do my help still that attacker threat me but police dont want arrest that criminals i dont know what i do .bcz my life not safe here dont know why police dont bother about my life.

Hello there I am a TBI survivor, I was hit by a car crossing the street when I was 12 years old. I am 29 now.

Hey,
I hit my head from a high distance, my parents never took me to a specialist or anything to get my brain checked. I am 29 now, and feel as if I am still affected by the incident, but I dont know what I can do to find out how it affects me.

I am writing to ask if there is any correlation between TBI and violent behavior that the aggressor did not realize was from the TBI. At 9, the child was a victim of a violent attack by his dad. They never did any follow-up and the focus became about me and not the abuse the child suffered. I have taken an interest in this as I too believe I am the victim of an undiagnosed TBI that affected my life. The child and I have some of the same rage, mood swings, emotional outbursts etc.. Can it lead to violence and other tendencies that go undiagnosed?

My husband had a TBI over 20yrs ago. We have been married for 18yrs and I am ashamed to say that I have until recently just gone off info related by his family. Never have I read about what "frontal lobe injury " really meant in terms of his behavior and personality. Over the years he has had several impulse control issues, gambling related, drug use, even sexually related issues that have nearly ended our marriage many times over. I've always asked him "why" he did what he did and his answer has always been the same, "he didn't know?" I always deemed that as a "cop out". Most recently he left our home on foot for a trip to the store and was gone for 48 hours! No call or text to me letting me know where he was or that he was ok! I called police reporting him missing and mildly put, I was a nervous wreck thinking the worst had happened! When he came home I was relieved and angry that he could make such a poor decision. He had run into an acquaintance and was asked to help him relocate, he was offered drugs and his cell battery died. Never did it occur to him how worried I would be or what an impact his lack of impulse control would cause. After this incident I decided to read more about all the personality changes and defects his injury has caused and I felt terrible! In all our years together I had never been aware of the numerous effects his frontal lobe injury has had on him. Consequently the overall effects it has had on our relationship, as I had not known him prior to this injury. His moodiness, inability to control his impulses, his temper, etc. Now I feel much more educated but as a result I am even more worried as to how to deal with these personality defects. How to help him control his impulses, his moods and how all this has and will continue to effect me and our relationship???

Dear Mrs. Anonymous,
The simple fact that you first recognized that there was an unseen issue with your other half, and then was wise enough to gather info about his struggles, (and yours) is indicative of a very rare human quality. True Empathy., and the natural instinct of the "wolf pack mentality" to take care of our beloved pack members. As I am the recipient of not one, not two, but three TBIs and one ABI , spanning 5 decades...,
to me that qualifies you for the Congressional Medal Of Honor at the very least.
We who carry the cross known as TBI or ABI do not require 'understanding'. To 'understand' is to experience it. God forbid ! What we so crave is to be 'believed'. For the overwhelming majority of folks simply do not! The reason for this phenomenon is summed up in one word you used in your commentary. Education.
A philosophy / motto we used in 'Crucible' during my stint in service goes like this...
"Embrace the SUCK !!! Adapt, Overcome and move through it" !
I am still alive because of it. Given the honest effort, which you seem to possess, it will work for you as well ma'am. I'm just not sure how it works.
My family is a large extended family made up of the very young to the old ones. None believe. I was, however, very blessed by Creator to have one individual in my life built of the same metal as you. My late father. Reverend Carl Leroy Rowell. Feb 29, 1935 to April 6, 2020. A giant among men !!! Much like your dear husband, I am a lucky man. He helped me beyond measure.
Dear madam, God knows I utter only the truth when I say to you that my heart and what's left of my mind hurts so terribly for you and your husband... because I believe.
I would so bear the crosses you and he struggle under if only it were possible. Sadly I cannot.
Keep in mind, however, the eighth Psalm. vs 5. You were created " a little lower than the angels." In fact you were created " in His image." Mrs. Anon., You Ma'am are 'Woman'. You are an entity of immense power, intelligence, and possibilities.
You are currently helping him in ways you cannot see yet by simply believing and caring. The rest of the things you can do to help your pack member will readily reveal themselves in time. Like my beloved father... I discern (by your words) that you are
" a giant among women "!
So......." Embrace the Suck !!! Adapt, Overcome, and Move Through It !

God's endless love and blessing be with you dear ma'am.

PS... Tell Mr Anon. that there is an old, southern Louisiana country boy that " has his 6." We're gonna make Bro!

Truly and always.., Victor E. Rowell

My husband received a severe TBI in the military 24 years ago. In the last few years we went from good days and bad to few and far between to living moment to moment. The VA has just begun to approve his claims but there are still several that cover the more severe symptoms that are still in appeal. He is to the point of struggling with normal activities, like buckling our grandson in his car seat.

You’re not alone, my boyfriend suffers from tbi from over ten years ago. He’s always mentioned it but it’s more apparent and Ofcourse affecting our relationship. I too started reading through this in hopes to find some therapy or counseling that can educate us and help us cope through this. The “ i don’t know” excuse is hard to accept

After reading a lot of these other comments, I am blessed, and feel almost silly now posting. I fell down my stairs and got 13 staples in November 2019. Still having many symptoms, I have gone through physical therapy and am now starting a cognitive therapy but get frustrated that what I can do has become so limited and keep wondering when it’s going to get better. Any advice on the line between pushing yourself and rest? Additionally, does the actual impact spot hurt for a while for others?

Yes, the impact spot for me still hurts. It is numb feeling but it very much hurts. The numbness is mostly felt when I touch it or put any pressure on it. I can’t comfortably sleep on my left side so I don’t sleep well. Everything is different since my injury. I forget the most simple things. Or as I talk I spontaneously forget what I was trying to communicate. Loose words I know the definition for etc. I wonder if it will EVER get better. Sometimes it is better then, hours later, I’m falling back in to the rabbit hole. It’s frustrating bc I live alone, no one checks on me, and I live in remote country where there isn’t even a neighbor to check on me. I guess this is my new life. Ugh.

I am 10 months post fall and I still have pain and edema where I fell on my left cheek and shoulder.. I was running at the time so had quite a forceful fall on concrete. I also have periods of sleepiness and moodiness. I feel so alone because I am no fun to be around and people have noticed.

I suffered a TBI at the end of August 2019 after falling from a height resulting in two subdural haematoma's and a subarachnoid haemorrhage in the temporal region. I was treated in hospital and now back to getting on with life. I turn 22 next month and forever worrying about the impacts this may have on me in the future or the chances of re-bleeding. Anyone experienced similar?

You are wise to be concerned for your future. Carefully keep documentation of your health records. This will help future providers follow your progress or future issues. There are cumulative effects as you age.. Depending upon location of injury and just about every other aspect of your individual circumstances. It’s ok to ask trusted love ones to pay attention to any alarming changes they may note. Bless you.

had same injuries from a fall with skull fracture. when I was 70(now77).plus you can grow whole new pathways in your brain called axons at your young age. this is not a recurring condition but don't take a bunch of blood thinners

Sorry to hear about your accident.

My son had an accident January 21 2020 em had sever brain damage the had to remove half of his skull had a lot of bleeding I the brain he last in the ICU a month an half..the doctors to me my son would need 24/7 care that he would never walk or be normal again. So they gave us some time to about his condition, if we wanted him to keep breathing with ventilator he wouldn’t be able to eat he had a trak and feeding tube on side of his stomach..so the family came to the conclusion to pull the plug, my son was a free spirit person loved to work on bikes, and help people, so we knew he wouldn’t want To live that way, not been able to be himself again, but in my mind i wonder if we did the right thing to transfer him to comfort care...he passed on February 27th 2020 I miss him so much that I still think his alive and just doing his thing in LA where he lived...I have a huge void in my heart,

Dear Josie,
I’m struggling with the same problem right now.

It breaks my heart to hear that you question whether you did the right thing. My mother suffered a traumatic brain injury on June 25. 2020 and I am often told by others not to lose my faith. Life has been hard for me since, but I always remind myself of what everybody has been telling me, “never lose faith.” So please, have faith in your decision. Because if your selfless heart, your son is no longer suffering. Open your heart and look for signs from him. I promise he is all around you, telling you to thank you for loving him enough to set him free. Keep your faith, and always keep searching for him; because he is right there by your side.

i wish you well.

I am so sorry for your loss... A devastating time for you all as a family.
My 27 years old son also had a very severe brain injury November 2018.
He also had his scull removed and his brain swelled... He was In a coma for 2 months maybe longer.
We was told exactly the same.. I often wonder if he forgives me as I fought for him to stay..
I let his body make the decision and it kept going... He does have a tube in his tummy and the trachy was removed some weeks later..
But he can not speak, eat, drink walk.
However he knows who we are, has a sence of humour and astonishingly he can work a motorized wheelchair..
He seems happy and is still in care rehabilitation as they think he has potential... But was it right.. I hope so...
You did what you thought was right but as a parents we always judge ourselves... In any decision.
Bless you and may happy memories feel your aching heart.

God bless you and family. Such a difficult decision. My only grandchild severely abused at 41/2 months. Worse case of shaken baby Drs had seen. Medical induced coma, life support, Drs told my son there was no chance. Son was 26 at time. I couldn’t help him with such a tough decision. Son decided to give his only child a fighting chance. Mother was in jail. Only grandchild still lives on feeding tube, he’s quad, only involuntary movement, infant like state for all his life. In 2012 son committed suicide. I found him with 1/2 his face from shooting self. My husband and I now raise my grandson while trying to hold down our jobs. You made the best decision you could. No one can ever fault you for doing what you felt was best for your son. My grandson is now 11. I have measures in place for no vent, no DNR, so many difficult things to face. God will decide his fate. I will love him and hold him till then. He survives on partial brain stem. Pituitary Gland barely functions. When God wants his angel back, I will hold him tight until they take him. Plans all made to have his brain researched just incase we can learn even one thing about his brain that might help in saving another child. The could have, should haves, questioning your difficult decisions will only make you hurt more. There is no wrong or right. I will pray for you. Losing our children is not the cycle of life. It’s just wrong.

So sorry to hear about your son. My heart goes out to you. My husband was in a horrible motorcycle accident in August 2019. He was also in a coma for 6 weeks, suffered a traumatic brain injury and multiple broken bones. He was beginning to open his eyes when the hospital asked if we wanted to take him off the ventilator. Family members pleaded with me to give him more time to recover. I relented. It is now 9 months later. He is in a nursing home. He is conscious but severely mentally compromised. He is unable to walk and has difficulty speaking and swallowing. He is still on a feeding tube and is incontinent. He needs care 24/7. His free spirit that was is gone. While I still love this man dearly our lives since the accident have been an absolute nightmare. I now feel like have done him a great disservice by be condemning him to the "life" he is living. Please find comfort in knowing that your son is at peace and his free spirit still lives on.

I am so sorry for the loss of your son. I think you know you did the right thing. You just want him back. You want him back whole and healthy. Warm hugs to you and your family.

My son had a car accident on May 22, 2017. He was thrown from his vehicle and sustained a diffused axonal brain injury. He woke from the coma on day 3, and on day 8 he was able to respond to the commands if thumbs-up, and squeeze hand. The days that followed he was unable to respond to any command. He was paralyzed on one side, had no vision in the eye on the same side, had lung issues due to ribs puncturing his lungs. The neurologists all concurred that he was in a permanent vegetative state. He was 33 yrs old and my only child. He was the love of my life. 46 days after his accident i had to make the hardest decision of my life. My son would never want to live that way. Would any of us? So, i decided that i would take the life sentence of the oain of living without him, rather than give him the life sentence of “ living” that way. You may wonder why i’m writing this almost 3 years since he passed. The answer is simple... i, like you, still wonder if there would have been any hope for him. I googled tbi’s, and found this post. I’m glad i did, because it helps to know i’m not alone. My life is changed forever, but i know deep in my heart i did what he would have wanted. My deeeoest sympathy in the loss of your son.
Danny’s mom- forever 33. If you would like to talk more, i am on fb

wow, that's so sad. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Dear Josie I am so sorry about the loss of your son. Your decision had to be heart breaking. I suffered a brain injury 8 years ago....the sixth in a long line of auto accidents. The last time we were rear ended by a semi truck. I can tell you there are still days I wish I had been unplugged. It is a long climb back filled with uncertainty and long hours of hard work. My husband has to care for me...I can’t drive...my eyesight was affected and I don’t process the same as everyone else. My perception is off I may think a shadow or a crack in the cement is really a step. I look pretty funny trying to step up where there is no step. I said all this to tell you that your sons injuries were more serious than mine... I have some quality of life but I never would have wanted to live confined to a wheel chair or never walk again. I use a walker and I’m so slow ...the world looks different I’m different. God only knows the suffering you face but I think you made the right choice. God knows when it’s our time to go home. I will be praying for you and your broken heart. Thank you for sharing your story.

its been almost 9 years now since that day, that motorcycleaccident brought me to coma for 10 days, and i don't remember it at all, for 4 months, i dont even remeber what happened they just told me everything, my problem now is this tension headache/everyday/all day rated 5/10 and this dizziness that i get when standing up plus this paresthesia on my right leg. any idea how to slow this down or better, make it disappear.

I too had a motorcycle accident 12 years ago and was in intensive care for a month and then rehab for the next 5 months. High-side from ~70 mph with no helmet but fortunately was thrown 50 feet over the curb and into the dirt. I was diagnosed with a moderate to severe TBL with brain bleeding. I have no memory of the event and too lost several months of memory. For a couple of weeks, I did not know my age, my wife’s name, etc. Amazingly, after six months I was able to return to my job managing a technology department. It is interesting to hear of your mention of paresthesia as I still have the same issue with my left leg with the worse symptoms in my foot with a slight decrease in symptoms moving up. For me, it mostly perceived as having a leg in ice water all the time. I wear shoes and a compression sock on my left side except when sleeping. I am now certain it is permanent… My marriage has certainly had its ups and downs, but we are still together…so far.

I also had dizziness when standing up and lying down after my TBI. I was told that your inner ear is effected and seen a chiropractor who made adjustments to correct the vertigo I was experiencing. It helped me alot.

Does anyone have an history with severe DAI traumatic brain injury. My husband got into an car accident and that was the result also with a lot of broken bones. He has endured a lot of surgeries but his body is healing fine. He was answering commands but had coded and now he doesn’t. He just moves around but is aware when someone is there. He has only been in the hospital 20 days. Do anybody knows what to expect?

I know how it is to have your head shattered. 7 years ago I had a motorcycle come through the driver door at my truck. When he came through the window his head hit mine. I was in a coma for a month I kept dying for 2 weeks and they didn't think I was going to make it. Luckily I'm stubborn and I proved them wrong. When I came out of a coma I've been told I was like a little kid again. They put me in a bad caregiving hospital but luckily my mom put me in for a waiting list to get into Craig hospital and thankfully I did get that 3 months after my accident. They helped me learn how to live again. I still have a lot of issues with my memory, like people's names or places I'm on my way to. If people are talking to me and uses the company's given name for a product I won't know what they're talking about. But if they come to me and tell me they're looking for fertilizer for their lawn I can take him right there. But throughout time you get used to it.it's like a joke my mom and I have cuz one day we were talking and I wanted a banana and I couldn't think of the word so I told her it was yellow and showed her how it was shaped and that's when she told me banana so as long as you guys keep a good sense of humor and don't let it kill you inside things will get better.

My son had an car accident November 2018 and suffered a severe DAI TBI with multiple other injuries. He was in ICU for weeks, had ETV surgery which failed and then had a permanent shunt implanted to relieve the excess cerebral spinal fluid. It was tragic. He was in inpatient rehab for 5 weeks and then sent home. I felt completely incapable of caring for him but as a mom, you do what you can do, research everything possible and accept any help that is offered. It was hard, very hard but 20 months later...my son is working part time, taking a class at a community college and is able to care for his personal needs. There is hope. It may not seem like it but the brain is an amazing organ that is capable of healing, however very, very slowly. My son does not remember the accident or being in the hospital for 2 months. His memory has slowly returned but for about 6 months he did not remember even what he ate for breakfast. You can do this. It will challenge you like nothing ever has but you find the strength out of your love for him. Ask God for strength and for people to support you. You arenot in this alone.

I’m not a doctor. My husband had a brain injury about 8 years ago. They’ve given up on helping him & the only thing I can do for you is to offer my heartfelt condolences. It’s a miracle if they remember you in any capacity. After a long time of hope you finally realize that the husband you knew & loved is not there anymore. That’s when the grief sets in. You try to stay positive for everyone, but you’ve lost the man you’ve had so many joys with. But he’s still there & you still love him. I will say this, this has got to be one of the most tragic things I’ve ever been through. I’ve lost my brother & mother, but it was different. I could grieve then heal. Not so with this. Some days you feel ok even cheerful just to have him. Then others it feels like you’ve had your heart & soul ripped from you. It’s especially hard if they’ve lost the will to survive. I pray your pain will not be so hard. Get someone you can talk to & be honest with.

Sincerely
Debra

I'm one of the husband's
I remember but everything's differant
I now grieve my loss of self
I don't know wut I lost but feel the voids
Heartbreaking the other way
Like u said a death is
This lingers
I'm congestive enough t see feel the pain it causes others
I sometimes wish I was blank
But keeping at wut Eva recovery I have
Be strong but cry it's sad it's ok t be sad
Just remember the happy too

Hi,
I am so sorry to hear of your husband's accident. My TBI came back in 1981, following a car accident as well, but no broken bones. While I was in a coma(5 weeks), I was also aware when others were in the room. I did start responding to questions by squeezing their hand - one for yes, two for no. It was only my right arm, however. My left side was basically paralyzed, and I had limited to no use of that for about the next year. Every brain injury is unique. I do not know the severity or specifics of your husband's injury, but know that it will not be the same for you or him from now on. Be adaptable, and patience is of utmost concern. Although it has been some 40 years since my injury, there are still times when old deficiencies crop up from the injury, but, with time, I have learned to cope with a good many of them. My thoughts are with you as you embark on this journey. That is how you must think of it - as a long journey, not an overnight stay.

Andy, Thanks for sharing - My son was injured in 1995 and I am really trying to follow others - he was 14 and now 39 and still struggles with learning, memory - not so much physical - but very easily stressed out - prayers for everyone to heal

how many days he spend in comma will determine the outcome

My exhusband had a TBI before we met and had children. Just wondering if they have found that the children are
genetically affected with learning disabilities possibly because of defective genetics. I say no, my son thinks yes

Jane,
Physical trauma does not affect how the DNA duplicated. An easier way to explain it is if i get my arm cut off. My children will still have both arms. There are a few things that affects sperm for example radiation.

No, i was in a level 3 acoma back in 1996 for 2 months. I got a severe t.b.i. and after I have two daughters. Ones in collage studying to be a nurse and doing very well. The other is doing very good with no assistance in school.

It was really helpful. I used a lot on my project that I am doing in school. Thanks. 5 stars.

I had a fall at work on 10-6-2018, I was unconscious for about 30 minutes and had a brain bleed and was put in a coma for two weeks while they fixed my hip and ribs and other assorted broken bones .I spent two months in hospitals ,now My broken bones have mended but I still have diplopia ,tinnitus, headaches and have trouble with maths and have memory issues,I am so sick of being like this, being irritable is an understatement! I feel bad for my elderly mom taking care of me ,I would be lost without her nagging me to eat or take a bath ..or brush my teeth as I forget to do stuff!

I had accident/story very similar to yours. Look into brain photomodulation or LLT. It resolved most of my problems with executive functioning. Also 3 years later I found out my irritability and anger were due to undiagnosed and untreated PTSD from head injury.

You are not alone I fell like I slip in and out of reality and it takes other people to help steer me and keep me on course. It requires a level of dependence on others that I never wanted. I’m a grown ?!* man and I should remember to eat, shower, and accomplish tasks. The adaptation required to live this new life is enough to drive a man insane. I hear you brother. Hang in there. You have less tools in your toolbox than you did before. But at least you have some tools. Learn to use the ones you do have. I set three alarms to accomplish every task that I need to get done. I never turn the alarm off until the task is accomplished. Keep it together. Focus on sleep and not drinking alcohol. Again you are not alone.

I had a TBI back in 12/21/2014 things had been going ok only grunge was I always had severe head aches and then they turned to sharp needle like pains in my brain at random times and would come more often if I’m stressed but for years now since then I’ve used alarms for many many things not just to wake up in the mornings like normal people do but to even remind me to leave my house for work or get ready for work so many make fun of me at work because I need an alarm as they to even “shower” but what they don’t know is after a TBI it is very difficult to remember many things after that situation, and lately I’m having gaps of moments where I don’t remember at all what I did such as me turning in an order to a customer at work I won’t remember I ever did that and it worries me because I don’t know how much worse this can become

I was 41 when I was catapulted from a 4 wheeler in Mexico. My helmet came off and I bounced down a dry riverbed on my head. I was told I bounced 3 times and was traveling about 45 -60 mph. I was unconscious for nearly an hour. I awoke in a Mexican ambulance and I'm told that for the next 18 hours I only spoke Spanish. This doesn't sound remarkable but before the accident, I had a very rudimentary understanding of the language. I was told that I was having conversations with hospital staff and my English speaking wife. I ended up suffering an anterior sternoclavicular dislocation, I broke the first four ribs on the left side completely displacing the 3rdn and 4th rib. I broke either the spinous or transverse process at C5 & C6, and fractured my skull from around the hairline on right side that seemed to transverse the skull ending behind my left ear. As I was on vacation at the time, I opted on completing the holiday. Oddly enough, I don't really recall too much over the next 7 days.
After returning to the states, my wife made me go to my primary care physician (PCP). I had all x-rays and records from Mexican hospital. As my PCP could not read the Mexican medical records, he ordered his own CAT scan and x-rays. When I returned to work colleagues noted issues with my memory and speech. I was sent home until cleared by neurologists and word from PCP. My PCP noted that by breaking the first 2 ribs and the length of the skull fracture that the trauma was equal to being sent through the front window of a speeding car. The neurologist saw the x-rays and CAT scan and the issues I was having was positively a TBI.
Initially, my short term memory very poor. So much so, as I could tell you a story get distracted and see you again and tell you the same story. I had expressive aphasia that lingers to this day. I was diagnosed with dyskinesia that has resolved. My memory has improved but I still have lingering issues just not as bad. The social-emotion and behavior affects do linger but have improved. Initially, a commercial could send me into tears. It's not nearly that bad anymore but I remain a sensitive fellow. Prior, no one would confuse me with being sensitive. I have anger issues still but not as bad. I continue to get irritated easily. To this day, I can not go into a enclosed space that is crowded without a panic attack ensuing. I learn not to take elevators during busy times of the day or go christmas shopping in a normal hour. After nearly 10 years, I've gotten accustomed to navigating the my world with the remaining symptoms. It's a part of my make-up now. In my case, most of the symptoms remain but they have lessened.
I hope this gives any readers a glimpse into a typical TBI and the issues that accompany some of us. For those that read this and say, "that is exactly like me," know that you can adapt and make it work for you the best you can. A poem by a German poet captures those of us that suffer from TBI's. Let everything happen to you; Beauty and terror; Just keep going; No feeling is final. Best of luck.

I am a 59 yr old vet with moderate TBI issues that include extreme rage ,getting lost ,forgetting things,at times I feel like have to concentrate to make my legs,I don't have friends,I hate being around people,I hear and smell things that aren't real and I cry for no reason. Numerous other things happen that I know aren't right. After 33 years of begging for relief from these problems I was diagnosed with moderate TBI. Treatment was the government mandated handful of drugs the V.A. uses to cure everything. I have continually asked for help for the last 33 years. I have a diagnosis of moderate TBI along with all the symptoms and some things nobody seem to know about. I have no idea what treatments are available. I have no idea if any of these problems are permanent. I have been in prison twice since I started asking for help. I don't believe I should have to beg for help when people get hurt because of me. I shouldn't have to go to prison because these people have decided not to help for the past 40 years

Hi Michael, I am sorry for your trauma and injury - non THC CBD Oil would really be of help to calm your nervous system. Prayers for you to feel God's presence and know his love - you sound like a survivor and I pray you hear God's voice and receive his strength to move ahead with victory of which you deserve!!!!

Dear Sir are you under the VA?

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