Motivation After a TBI

It's not just motivation. It's that spark of getting you moving that is lacking. Very difficult to go from sitting to doing. When my TBI first happened you could have told me the house was on fire and it felt as though that wouldn't have made me move. I would've been like "Oh. That's too bad...." Often times it is also my fear of "losing it" that keeps me from things. I've said and sobbed/screamed some things as well as gotten out there and felt like I just couldn't handle being out there at that time. My heart pounds and I start to freak. Other times I feel like my head just can't comprehend quickly and accurately enough all that is going on. What is so important, to me anyway is to be understood and to have help available. This is a scary situation.

Thank you all for your honest and insightful contributions. I am 9 years out from my TBI and have experienced many varied symptoms . Although much of my previous self has returned lol I am still dealing with the mental and physical fatigue, lack of motivation and many incidences of depression. So far I've tried almost all that which I read here with little permanent change. But I am very glad to here that What I am still experiencing and struggling with is not abnormal and I am not imagining it and most importantly I am not just a lazy slug. As all of you I continue to search and continue to hope that those around me beleive in me support me understand and have compassion. Thank you

Get her HBOT treatments. I’ve had them for multiple brain injuries. They work. HBOT.com

Thank you for all of the reassuring comments. I struggle with motivation every day and for the most part I can get through the noisy day. It takes its toll quickly though. After reading these stories, I don't feel alone with how I feel and I don't need to feel inadequate. But I do. I have heard many of the comments a lot of us have heard like "You look fine" and "Maybe you're using your TBI as a crutch" - that one is particularly cruel coming from anyone who has not experienced a TBI. It's been 2 1/2 years since my fall and resulting TBI and I get frustrated by feelings of inadequacy and not "feeling" right anymore. I just cannot explain how it feels and that does not help at all. I am blessed with a loving and supportive wife along with my children and few good friends. Let's keep moving forward in our recovery!

I had TBI, frontal lobe, 30 years ago. I have terrible trouble getting motivated and staying motivated. One thing that helps (sometimes) is turning off the TV and using a timer. Then I get bored. But I "try" to use it as a reward. 1/2 hour of cleaning (which I hate) and a 15 minute reward of TV. Still trying to perfect this system though. 😇

It stinks when you're no longer the capable person you were pre-tbi, and for a teenager that has to be especially hard. No doubt you already do a good job empathizing with her. Maybe try expanding from empathy to celebration of even the small things she's doing. Give her a genuine compliment whenever she accomplishes even the tiniest thing that takes focus, or organization, or planning, or extended effort - or any of the things she used to be able to do so easily. Maybe keep a little diary (a scratchpad would do) to jot down a word or two about what you saw her do that was worth a compliment. Then maybe once a week or every few weeks, take a look at that scratch pad & see what she's done. Share it with her so she can see she's making progress. Does she use facebook? Maybe suggest she connect with a brain injury group that way - folks who know what it's like to walk a mile in her shoes. It'll take time and effort and patience and help and enthusiasm, and maybe especially new tips & tricks to do familiar tasks. She needs you to believe in her to help her believe in herself again, and she needs you to be genuine - no fake happy faces. Best of luck for both of you.

Having had a severe Brain Injury myself I know how she is feeling. Her brain is working but ever so slowly and thinking and responding to people is very difficult. You need to allow her to relax. Watch her closely and offer her things she liked before the brain injury. Life is ever so different. Nothing is easy but you don't have any connection with reality as the rest of the family and friends do around you. Be there for her. Keep it simple. Don't change routines or she will become more frustrated. Put things back where they were so she can find them. Having to lay around is a way of coping the best way you can. In time she will start to get it together. In the meantime walk at her speed and don't expect the old daughter responses.  Some challenging activities can be introduced like buying a carton of milk at the shop. I can remember going across the road to buy 3 things and having to come back 5 times to ask again what they were. Then My wife gave me the list. That worked.

Thank you for pointing out that apparent lack of motivation does not mean the same thing in a TBI survivor than it would otherwise. When every step of every decision requires filtering of dozens of related, but ultimately inapplicable ideas, a person with very high internal motivation can come across to others as distant, and uninterested. There may also be some depression involved in understanding that some former abilities may never be regained, but we all have abilities we never explored, and for every lost ability, a previously neglected ability may take its place. Long term, there is plenty of cause for hope. Another reason not to be too quick with a diagnosis of depression is that an injured brain can be loosing neurons due to excessive levels of neurotransmitters released by dying neurons, in a cascade that could be exacerbated with antidepressants. Rest, and careful monitoring of the balance of inflammation may be the best approach during the first two years after an injury. Too much inflammation may cause more neurons to die, but too little inflammation may prevent healing.

HȦnell, A. (2011). Plasticity and Inflammation following Traumatic Brain Injury. Uppsala: Acta Universitatis Upsaliensis.

Morganti-Kossmann, M. C., Rancan, M., Stahel, P. F., & Kossmann, T. (2002). Inflammatory response in acute traumatic brain injury: a double-edged sword. Current Opinion in Critical Care, 8(2).